Dropped the Ball

My initial title was "I Suck" but I am trying to not be so self depreciating.  So I'll stick with saying that I have seriously dropped the ball.......its not even in the same game as me anymore.  Right around the time I joined this blog, my son turned 1.  I also slipped and fell, either bruising or breaking my tailbone and am STILL not allowed to do a full impact work-out.  We had a party, and were in the process of looking for a new apartment.  Found one on an insanely quick turn.  We had the keys in hand less then 3 weeks later.  Then came the packing, and the moving, and the unpacking, and getting the kiddo adjusted to his new place.  So then what did we do, go back to my parents for a week to dog-sit while they went away.  Like I said, ball not even in my game anymore.  We are leaving tomorrow morning for a weekend away and a wedding.  Yea......because nobody ever overeats at a wedding.  By the way, I'm in the wedding and I HATE the way my dress looks.  I'd hate the way any dress would look.  No amount of Spanx can help me.

I am so mad at myself.  It seems like I am constantly saying, "When X happens, I'll be accountable."  I need to be accountable NOW.  I know my cholesterol is high and both of my parents have Type II Diabetes.  WTF am I waiting for?  I want to be healthy for my son.  I want to be able to run around with him without getting winded. I want to look better in my clothes.  I want to feel better in general.  I want, I want, I want....yea, I also want cookies.  I used to have a fabulous, no seriously F-A-B-U-L-O-U-S, metabolism.  My mind just can't seem to grasp that it isn't there anymore. 

I just weighed myself (post-dinner) and am at 188.6.  I plan to do a first thing, naked weigh-in tomorrow morning, but might not get it online before our flight.  Here's to hoping SOMETHING clicks and really gets me moving this time.